Good morning and blessed Good Friday. 7-Eleven claims it’s releasing a new hot dog-flavored sparkling water. We’re 99% sure this is an April Fool’s Day joke — the company says more details are coming on April 1. If that’s the case, props to their marketing department. If this is real? Well…

ECONOMY

🍫 The cocoa crisis has come

Bad news. We're running out of chocolate. Cocoa prices hit $10,000 per ton this week for the first time. That's up from $4,000 in January. Rising shipping costs and poor weather are partially to blame. But it goes deeper than that.

• Despite the price increases, the best-selling candies in every state are still chocolate.

• Because everything is right in the world, Reese's Eggs are #1. Peeps come it at #8.

Two countries in West Africa control 60% of global cocoa production -- Ivory Coast and Ghana. Too much rain, dry spells, and plant diseases have destroyed much of their cocoa crop. As a result, output has tanked.

• High prices have Hershey's trying to grow its gummies business by 50% this year.

• Consumers are being forced to redirect their Easter purchases to (*shudder*) Peeps. Milk chocolates and bars with fruit and nuts are also money savers. The key is less cocoa.

About 90% of cocoa worldwide is grown on small, family-run farms. But it's difficult and expensive to grow. The trees take ages to mature, too. That makes the disease issues tough to recover from. Plus, West African governments set the market price of cocoa and they can't always respond adequately to bad weather or disease outbreaks. So farmers in Ghana are moving on to different, easier crops.

• Meanwhile, the global middle class is growing faster than that kid who showed up for seventh grade two heads taller. And what do people do when they get more money? Buy more chocolate.

Soaring demand and tanking supply is a deadly combination. Consumers, candy companies, and (especially) African farmers are all worse off for it. And it’s a problem that may have the Easter Bunny cutting back for years to come.

NEWS

⚓ Old law vs. new bridge

Hey, it worked for the owner of the Titanic in 1912. Why not try it again? The insurance company involved in the Baltimore bridge collapse will likely try to limit its financial liability for the accident. How? By using the (still in force) Limitation of Liability Act of 1851. Yeah, turns out, old laws don't just disappear.

• If not, the insurer could be out $4 billion due to lost business at the Port of Baltimore. And the cost of a new bridge.

• They'll likely owe the bridge in the end. But the Biden administration wants Congress to cough up the cash for now to get the ball rolling.

Regardless, the rebuilding will likely take years. And a decision will need to be made on whether to rebuild it as it was or use a totally new design.

• Ships have increased massively in size and weight since the Francis Scott Key Bridge was designed ~50 years ago. A new design may work better.

• The National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) is looking into whether the non-collapsed portions of the bridge are still usable.

Because the shipping company is based in Singapore and this ship flew its flag, the Singaporean government is also investigating.

POLITICS

🔵 A few updates on Joe Biden:

• President Biden raised over $25 million last night at a star-studded NYC fundraiser. The event, held at Radio City Music Hall, sold more than 5,000 tickets and also featured former Presidents Obama and Clinton. The Biden campaign claims it’s the largest single political fundraiser in U.S. history. By comparison, Trump raised only $20 million in all of February.

• First Lady Jill Biden will publish a children's book about the Bidens’ pet cat, Willow. "Willow the White House Cat" comes out in June.

🔴 A few updates on Donald Trump:

• At the family's request, Trump yesterday attended the wake for slain NYPD officer Jonathan Diller. Diller, 31, was fatally shot (beneath his bullet-resistant vest) during a traffic stop in Queens on Monday.

• In response to Biden’s huge fundraiser, the Trump campaign claims it will raise a whopping $33 million at an event of its own next week.

• Trump's first criminal trial (over hush money payments) begins April 15 in New York. The judge, Juan Merchan, put him under a gag order this week. The order bars Trump from publicly commenting on jurors or potential witnesses in the case. But he's still free to hit the judge and prosecutor (that’s Alvin Bragg, an elected Democrat).

🔵 Former Connecticut Sen. Joe Lieberman (D) passed away this week aged 82. Lieberman was Al Gore’s pick for VP in 2000 and was the first Jewish person to appear on a major party ticket. He was first elected in 1988 with the support of conservatives over the incumbent liberal Republican (similar to how Bernie Sanders was first elected, shockingly). Lieberman later lost the Democratic primary in his 2006 reelection race but won the general election after starting a third party for that purpose. He was also national co-chair of centrist group No Labels.

🔴 A judge ruled that the vice chair of the Georgia Republican Party voted illegally nine times. He was convicted of a felony in the 90s in Pennsylvania for check forgery (but didn’t go to jail). As a result, he lost his right to vote for a while. He moved to Georgia and voted, claiming his time was up. Turns out it wasn’t.

⚪ The Republican-controlled Kentucky state legislature passed a bill taking away the governor’s power to appoint a replacement U.S. senator in the event of a vacancy. The new system will require a new election. The state’s Democratic governor opposes the change (obviously), but Republicans have a veto-proof majority here. So there's nothing he can do. The state’s senior senator, Sen. Mitch McConnell, is 82 and has had a few health scares lately.

TRIVIA

Maryland’s governor, Wes Moore, is just the fifth African-American governor of a U.S. state. Which four states, in addition to Maryland, have had African-American governors?

WORLD

🇬🇧 United Kingdom: Director (and confusing timeline aficionado) Christopher Nolan will be knighted by King Charles III and shall henceforth be known as Sir Christopher Nolan. This is technically the same thing as a knight from the Middle Ages. You just don't need a suit of armor anymore.

🇵🇸 Palestine: Amid international pressure, the Palestinian Authority created a new, allegedly more technocratic, government cabinet. The move could help build support for their desire to govern Gaza after the war. The authority currently governs only the West Bank, which makes up the bulk of recognized Palestinian territory but doesn't border the Gaza Strip.

🇮🇱 Israel: An Israeli Supreme Court ruling is halting subsidies to ultra-Orthodox Jewish men who are not typically required to serve in the military. They called the system discriminatory to the other 87% of Israelis. All other Israeli men must complete three years of military service. Women complete two.

🇺🇦 Ukraine: The United States is proposing to its Group of Seven (G7) allies the sale of $50 billion worth of war bonds to support Ukraine’s war effort. The bonds would be paid back over time with interest earned on $280 billion in seized Russian assets around the world.

BRIEFS

• Convicted crypto mogul Sam Bankman-Fried was sentenced yesterday to 25 years in prison and penalized $11 billion

• Puerto Rico’s government declared an epidemic of mosquito-borne dengue fever

• Israeli President Isaac Herzog met with a gaggle of Congressional Democrats in Israel

• The Biden administration will loan an energy company $1.5 billion to restart a shuttered nuclear power plant in Michigan

• Mayor Eric Adams said NYC will start using AI to detect guns at subway stations

• Nine months after raising its maximum product price from $1.25 to $5, (Seven) Dollar Tree will now sell some items for $7

• The number of Palestinian war deaths in Gaza, though still high, may only be about half of what the Hamas-run government claims

• The 2030 U.S. Census will include new demographic checkboxes for Hispanic and Middle Eastern people

• A biotech startup says next-gen cancer drugs will be made in space since the lack of gravity allows for perfect protein crystallization

QUOTE

SNACKS

🍿 Streaming: Disney+ has finally merged with Hulu after buying out former partner Comcast last fall. Hulu content is now available in the Disney+ app for everyone. But there's a catch. You’ll need a separate Hulu subscription to watch it. A combo sub to both services only runs an extra $2 a month. The ad-supported combo will cost you $9.99 a month.

🎈 Retro-futurism: A British company plans to launch a fleet of hybrid airships (not technically blimps) for commercial flights in Europe by 2028.

🧁 Pop-Tarts: Jerry Seinfeld is such a huge fan of Pop-Tarts that he made a movie about their creation. Netflix just dropped the trailer for “Unfrosted: The Pop-Tart Story,” releasing May 3.

ANSWER

Here’s the full list:

1. P.B.S. Pinchback (R) governed Louisiana from 1872 to 1873. He was only governor for a month.

   .

   .

   .

2. Doug Wilder (D) governed Virginia from 1990 to 1994.

3. Deval Patrick (D) governed Massachusetts from 2007 to 2015.

4. David Paterson (D) governed New York from 2008 to 2010.

Pinchback was only governor for a month. He was the lieutenant governor who took over when his predecessor was booted from office (that guy was elected at only 26 years old, by the way).

Wilder was the first elected Black governor. He only served one term, as that’s the limit in Virginia.

Deval Patrick was the first to serve two full terms. He later made a short, poorly received campaign for president in 2020.

David Paterson was another lieutenant governor who took over. His predecessor, Eliot Spitzer, went down in a prostitution scandal. He’s also the first legally blind governor.

Before becoming governor of Maryland, Wes Moore served in the Army (for 16 years), went to Oxford, wrote a book, and hosted a show on the Oprah Winfrey Network. You know, typical job stuff.